Piadas em Inglês

less than 1 minute Contribuição anônima An angry wife [A esposa irritada] to her husband [(falando) para o marido] on the phone: “Where the hell are you? [Por onde você anda?; Onde você se meteu?]” Husband: “Darling [Meu amor], you remember that jewellery shop [joalheria] where you saw [onde você viu] the diamond necklace [colar de diamantes] and totally fell in love with it [e pelo qual você se apaixonou] and I didn’t have money that time [e eu não tinha dinheiro na época] and said ‘Baby, it’ll be yours one day‘ Continue→

less than 1 minute Contribuição anônima The maid asked for a raise… The maid asked for a pay raise. [A empregada pediu aumento.] Madam [A patroa] was very upset [irritada, nervosa, chateada] about this [com a situação] and asked [perguntou]: “Now Maria, why do you want an increase? [por que você quer um aumento?]” Maria: “Well madam, there are [são] three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that, I iron better than you [eu passo (roupa) melhor do que a senhora].” Madam: “Who said [Quem falou] you iron Continue→

less than 1 minute Contribuição anônima Tom had won [ganhou; tinha ganhado] a toy [brinquedo] at a raffle [sorteio, rifa]. He called his kids together [mandou chamar os filhos; reuniu os filhos] to ask [para perguntar] which one [qual deles] should have the present [deveria ganhar o presente]. Cf. Qual é a tradução de “CHILDREN”? “Who is the most obedient?” [Quem é o mais obediente?] he asked. “Who never talks back to mother? [Quem nunca responde (retruca) para a mamãe?] Who does everything she says? [Quem faz tudo o que ela pede?]” Cf. Gramática: Graus Continue→

less than 1 minute Mark G. Nash e Willians Ramos Ferreira Keeping the Beat I was in a bar yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat so that nobody would hear them. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my beer and noticed that everybody was staring at me. Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod. Cf. “BAR” Continue→

less than 1 minute Mark G. Nash e Willians Ramos Ferreira Little Johnny A door-to-door salesman comes-a-knocking and 10-year-old Little Johnny answers, a beer in one hand and a lit cigar in the other. The salesman says, “Little boy, is your mommy home?” Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, “What the hell do you think?“ Cf. Gramática: Adjetivos Numéricos Cf. Falsos Cognatos: CIGAR Cf. Mais Piadas em Inglês door-to-door salesman > vendedor ambulante comes-a-knocking > chega e bate na porta Continue→

less than 1 minute Mark G. Nash e Willians Ramos Ferreira The Fishing Trip Dave and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn’t go this time because his wife wouldn’t let him. After a lot of teasing and name calling, Dave headed home frustrated. The following week when Dave’s buddies arrived at the lake they were shocked to see Dave. He was already sitting on the dock, fishing rod in hand, Continue→